Afraid to fail again.

In a recent journey of self-exploration, I began to uncover at least one negative impulses that tempts me to give up on life and on trying to do things right again: the fear of failure, the fear that no matter how many times I try, I may never get it right.

In truth, it’s a pretty lame fear to base actions on. The fear of death or injury are definitely fears on which to base actions on because the consequences of death or injury are in and of themselves painful. But I see no reason for failure to be painful in and of itself. Failure seems to be nothing more than a state of not having succeeded at a particular endeavor.

One may argue that failure would mean that the time/energy/money you invested in the endeavor have gone to no use. However, rarely do we find that the time/energy/money invested in an endeavor has gone to absolutely no use. It is true that it may not have contributed to the endeavor to which we invested it, but it in all probability may have contributed positively to some other positive endeavor to which we did not originally intend.

Makes me think of Edison remarks. On being discouraged by an assistant from trying further to find a suitable element for the light-bulb filament after 500 trials, Edison remarked that rather than having 500 failed experiments, they now had 500 experiments that proved conclusively which elements would not work.

What if the only investments required are some more focus, energy, and time, all of which you have at your disposal at present? I have these at my disposal right now. If I succumb to the fear again, I know that I will get no where. But if I try again, I may at least stand the chance of succeeding. So what will it be? Sure failure, or another possibility however small of getting it right this time? I’ll take the latter.

Filed under: Life, Personal Development , edison, failure, fear, success

What’s holding you back?

There are plenty of areas on my life I know where I need to change, work on, and grow. But something seems to be holding me back.

Part of it could be simple psychological inertia (I’ve been in the state of ‘rock-bottom’ for quite a while and the natural tendency is to remain in that state). Part of it is fear that I will fail again. After all, it isn’t the first time that I’ve tried to change and better myself, and all I can remember from such trials in the past are failures.

Part of it is also the feeling that the changes I want in my life are so many and so radical that it would be almost pointless trying to change; the feeling that I won’t see any return on my investment of time and energy into improvement any time soon.

Now I could spend some time trying to reason with myself and prove to myself that none of these things that are holding me back are legitimate reasons, but I find that I don’t have to. Just bringing them into the open seems to have stripped them of their powers to thwart me.

And above all, the Lord is willing that I should change; He gave His life on the cross to empower me to change and live for His glory. However that realization had till now been clouded by my supposed stumbling blocks.

So here’s a suggestion for anyone trying to change something in their lives and finding themselves hesitating to do what they know is right. Take a moment to think and write down what it is that is holding you back. If you need to, reason with yourself and write down your reasoning. Talk with someone about your hesitations. Bringing your doubts fears and stumbling blocks into the light strips them of their power over you. And above all, pray.

Filed under: Life, Personal Development , change, failure, fear, growth, inertia